In the past when I've posted humor I've been accused of being off-topic. So let me preface this post by saying that it has nothing to do with how to live (except to the extent that the right way to live might be "with as much humor as possible"). Without further ado, here are some classic insults...
- "I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." Groucho Marx
- "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." Clarence Darrow
- "Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it." Moses Hadas
- "He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." Winston Churchill
- "I feel so miserable without you, it's almost like having you here." Stephen Bishop
- "He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends." Oscar Wilde
- "Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go." Oscar Wilde
- "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." Mark Twain
- "He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination." Andrew Lang
- "In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily." Charles, Count Talleyrand
- "He is not only dull himself, he is the cause of dullness in others." Samuel Johnson
And my favorite...
George Bernard Shaw, in a letter to Winston Churchill: "I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play, bring a friend... if you have one."
Winston Churchill's response: "Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second... if there is one."